"Being Twenty-Something"

Its back to my desk in good old Ranka Plaza in Frazer town, Bangalore after a whirlwind of travel and work. Egypt, Cochin, Goa! Conferences, Conclaves, Dum Ass Mallu Drivers, Aapam and Airpots... its been one helluva fortnight. Phew!
Its that long since I blogged. My offline life seems to be taking over my online life. I still have to upload photographs, my travelogue, list of places to see.
Ive been tagged, need to tag another 8 people. Radio's blooming out, need to get a new demo done. And work is just making life chaotic, but frankly I wouldnt have it any other way.

Anyways, in between all this hungama I managed to see the movie Rang De Basanti - first day first show, (thanx to Ammu :-)). And some might not find this movie as inspirational as I did, but it did manage to get some part of me thinkin. The last time I had this effect through the film medium was with "Yuva", and before that through "Roja".

I realised IM 25, 5 Years ago I was only 20! I wanted to take over the world then. I wanted to be a Millionare by the time I was 25.
In 5 years ill be 30. will I be where i wanted to be 5 years ago, 5 years hence.
I decided to pen a few thought on the same. (Creative inspiration credit to unknown author from whom I borrowed some thoughts)


They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that
too, ! And that they aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are
as confused as you.

You look at your work... and feel happy that your doing what your want. You realise that lucky are the few who do what they like, the rest have to like what they do!
BUt you wonder how long you can do what you do, and What else can you do, Cuz you have to do something all your life. But then again.. do you really have to?

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to
do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken and
wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you.

Or maybe you love someone & that someone loves you too , but society and circumstances are hell bent on keeeping you apart. You decide to fight, you decide to set fire to the world. And you realise yout swimming upstrem. But your know deep inside you'll win the war, but you just can say how. Sometimes you cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person.

Random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. Partying every night seems childish. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, buying property, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What one may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

If your just read this and are far away from your 30th birthday and your 20th birthday is long gone.. then.. Welcome to the 25th year of your life!!